Sunday, March 7, 2010

How to Live a Long Life


I was listening to NPR this morning on the way to fetch a breakfast that I knew wasn't good for me. I was out of nutritious cereal and drove quickly so the Universe wouldn't spot me on the way to nutritional armageddon and strike me down.

The radio was running one of those stories that give you a list of things that will make you live longer.

Number one was clean water. I've got brown water at my place, but it's organically brown. (Iron-eating bacteria.) Still, I suppose it's time to make yet another effort to find a plumber who will show me how to chlorinate my well. All I need is someone to show it to me once and I can handle it from there.

Number two was exercise. Movement. Get out there and show Life that you're actually alive.

I must remember to do that now and then.

Then came the bit about fresh fruits and veggies, with the occasional healthy smoothie thrown in. The other night Alton Brown gave a recipe for the smoothie he chooses to sip on throughout his mornings. It sounds doable and viewer reviews reported that it's excellent. I'll give it a try.

Mentioned on the list but for some reason not emphasized, was something that surprised me: Do things you like to do.

I'm always running on a list of things I HAVE to do, which often are things I have to get out of the way before I can do what I want to do, things that I've managed to make into businesses where people expect me to do them. Which takes a little bit of the fun out of it all.

So right here and now (while I'm digesting that bacon and sugary apple thing from breakfast) I'm going to improve my life. More water (and I'll try to clean it a little better than just running it through a filter that's on its last legs), lots more fresh/frozen fruits and veggies, a whole lot more movement (especially out in the yard, which is still a wreck) with an attempt to find some kind of pseudo-exercise that is enjoyable...

Speaking of enjoyable, I'll do stuff that I get a kick out of doing, like art for art's sake, writing for art's sake (oh, okay. With serious attempt to sell finished stuff), comics, travel, and petting the cats.

Someone please tell me it's not too late to start!

Friday, March 5, 2010

Gail has left the building



Gail Simone's run on Wonder Woman has been a milestone, one that I'm sure future writers will steer by.

I'd been wondering when this announcement would come. First Gail pulled back from hinting at future stories, and then about a month ago she phrased a post concerning her run in the past tense, and I knew for sure it was over.

Gail has invigorated Wonder Woman, has given Wondie enough PR to make other pros stand up and look this way, wondering what the big hubbub was about. I believe it has made many reconsider who they think Wonder Woman is and what she is capable of.

I may not have agreed with some of the GS additions to the mythos, but I've certainly enjoyed others enormously. I may have wondered at how some storylines played out, but others were a hoot and a half, those kinds of tales that come around once every decade or so and make WW worthy of a lifetime of fandom. The energy of this era has crackled!

I feel that whoever succeeds Gail will be following in her footsteps. I hope they'll find the Wondieverse has been opened again to allow magical flights of imagination and inspiration combined.

I lift my cup of chai to Gail to thank her for all her WW work both in the comic and in her PR efforts, and to wish her the best in her future endeavors!

Monday, March 1, 2010

It's good to be a woman


Had to post this. Just got it via chain email, but it might be from Savvy Magazine:

It is good to be a woman!

1. We got off the Titanic first.
2. We can scare male bosses with the mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
3. Taxis stop for us.
4. We don't look like a frog in a blender when dancing.
5. No fashion faux pas we make could ever rival the Speedo.
6. We don't have to pass gas to amuse ourselves.
7. If we forget to shave, no one has to know.
8. We can congratulate our teammate without ever touching her rear end.
9. We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
10. We have the ability to dress ourselves.
11.  We can talk to the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
12.  If we marry someone 20 years younger, we are aware that we will look like an idiot.
13. We will never regret piercing our ears.
14. There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
15. We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence because they aren't listening anyway.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

Organizing is a, well, you know

Things have been particularly crazy lately. I've had a HUGE to-do list and haven't been able to get anything on it done. Until the last few days.

I'm the type who looks at a big job to be done and sits down to think about it. While having a little snack.

Yes, yes, I know I'm supposed to break a large job down into tiny steps that are much more easily accomplished, but to do that first I've got to work my way through that idea of a HUGE, FREAKING job that's staring at me.

So okay, I'm over the initial shock now. And I'm setting up some motivators along the way. For example, in my quest to organize my house I've employed a lady from work who comes in twice a month and dusts and vacuums (not very well, but it's something and I can see she's working hard). This makes me at the very least keep the house in the same shape as the last time she saw it, much less messier.

But the Olympics are on! And those Swedish men curlers are so daggum GORGEOUS! (sob sob—They lost the bronze!)

That huge pile of videotapes that I wanted to convert into DVD? I bought the converter over a year ago. Unpacked it two weekends ago. Made it through the pile of non-X-rated tapes sitting in my living room, hooray! Then checked the house to see if there were any other stray tapes... And found another mountain. The last one is in the converter as I type this.

Still have the X-rated stuff to go through. Luckily for me, only about 0.05% of porn is any good. The real chore will be trying to remember where the good stuff is hidden and get that preserved for Posterity.

(Don't even ask me about taking two bins of X-rated videotape covers down to the recycling place! I tried to choose the most inaccessible bin, dumped everything in the covered portion of it, and then went through my car looking for fast food misc. paper to use to layer over it.)

Moved the last of my credit card debt to a loan with much lower interest rates. Halleluiah! No more credit card charging for me, except in emergency situations! Last Wednesday my car decided to get seriously sick. Well, I can pay that off in a few months...

Have been taking a million courses on PR. Got a novel and short story published on Lulu and/or Amazon. Just got my fiction website redesigned. Am now procrastinating on starting the redo of the art section. (But I got the new business cards done!)

Am scheduled to blog at Terry's Place this, uh, Tuesday. Blog done and sent; must make a few mentions of it here and there, but I can consider that tucked in. My "Star-Spangled Panties" column is grossly overdue at CBR, but the umbrella "Wonder of Wonders" column hasn't appeared in ages—it's been transferred to the "Comics Should Be Good" section, which I've never been able to understand the organization of—but there are two columnists in front of me so I don't have to panic yet.

OT: So do you think the "Wonder of Wonders" thing is dead? Should I just start doing the column over here instead?

The house is about to explode with items I want to eBay. Anyone for a bungie sex swing (unused)? How about a box of romance novels? Or some great art workshop videotapes?


Haven't had time to write or paint much. Haven't switched out the paintings at the Saratoga Restaurant that have been there for far too long. (Though the lady there hasn't called me to complain yet.) I'll get to all that this week.

I'll just be doing it one small step at a time. And trying to remember to REWARD myself after I hit each goal!

So what are YOU putting off doing this week? How long does your current "to-do" list stretch? How do you approach your goals?

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

This is a test... This is only a test...



Just wanted to see if you could slap those things down anywhere, and you can. So much easier than sending a reviewer a lengthy excerpt to run alongside their review!

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

A few words about the Golden Heart...

I like to participate in the various organizations of which I'm a member. One of those is RWA, and one way I can help out is by helping to judge the first round of the Golden Hearts. The often-cited requirements for judges is that I have to be (1) a member of RWA, and (2) breathing. I fulfill both counts.

Before I'd joined RWA I'd never heard of the Golden Heart. A friend had won it and/or been a finalist several times and I'd smile and congratulate her without realizing the importance of the event. The Golden Heart is THE highest award given to a writer of romance who is still unpublished.

It costs $50 to enter. ($100 if you're not an RWA member. What, they let non-members enter?) One has to print out six copies of 55 pages of material (that includes a synopsis of no more than 15 pages) or supply a CD of same. It other words: the process ain't cheap.

In the old days when dinosaurs roamed Houston, judges could comment on the entries and give the authors helpful hints for improvement. Not any more; lawsuits were instituted by disgruntled entrants, and so RWA merely assigns numbers to the final entries: 1 is pretty darned awful, and 9 is sublime. Also, the entry form has the entrant sign a waiver, which includes among other wording: "I shall accept and abide by the decisions of any judges and/or Contest officials regarding finalists or winners for the Contest."

I'm no lawyer, but someone who signs that has just signed away their right to raise a ruckus if they didn't final, right? So no probs there. We should be able to make comments with no backlash, right?

But we judges are still stuck with the one number to assign to each manuscript. Early in the game it occurred to me that unless an entry got an 8 or 9, it wasn't going to final, so I could take it easy on those writers who passed in work that was... well... Let's say I arrived at this conclusion when I was quite literally banging my head on the table, moaning, "Lord, make it stop. Make it stop!" as I plodded my way through one entry. I finally realized it wasn't going to be a candidate for finalist, so I could put a low number on it and move along. (I did read the entire thing, though. Let me make that clear.) I didn't want to completely discourage the author (her enthusiasm was telling) but I wanted her to know that she really needed to learn more about her craft before assuming what she was writing was publishable. In other words: I don't give out 1s, 2s or 3s, but I do assign 4s.

Each year in my stack of about 6 entries I usually find one real dud (sorry), one or two terrific, engaging entries, one that's almost there, and the rest are meh. This year only the last manuscript was good, and so far (not finished yet! Let me savor it) it's terrific.

The others are duds. Awful. Oh-my-gods.

And yet the authors' enthusiasm still shines in them. It's such a shame to me that I can't make the occasional comment that might allow them to step back and think again about how they present their material. After all, the Golden Heart is to showcase material that an author thinks is publish-ready.

So since I cannot mark up the entries and return them for perusal, here are my suggestions to future Golden Heart entrants:

• Spell check is your friend. Don't guess at your spelling; double-check it.

• If you aren't confident in your use of proper English, get someone who is, to check your entry before sending it in. Be professional.

• Make sure your plot makes sense. Even if (I am not making this up!) you send in a 12-page, single-spaced synopsis to explain everything, double check to see that it does and doesn't just make things more confused. If the 50 pages you sent in only covers the first two paragraphs of that synopsis, something is wrong. If your synopsis handles the fates of fifteen male heroes who are all in lust with your comely heroine, your plot might need some simplifying. If it is not clear what your primary hero and heroine's goals are (internal, external, whatever) from the start, much less how they change over the course of the book and why, perhaps you need to re-examine your plot and how well it is focused.

• Your book should start on page 1, not page 33. No lie, I just read one that had all narrative backstory until page 33. Zzz!

• Usually, your backstory/flashbacks should be kept until chapter 3 or so, at which time you can start to dribble stuff in--IF IT IS NECESSARY FOR THE READER TO UNDERSTAND. Now, YOU have to understand your characters' backstories, but your plot will often not require it of the reader. If so, leave that part out.

• Compare your approach to that of published writers in your genre. Are you writing a futuristic? Do you keep referring to oddball futuristic accoutrements in every other sentence, drawing the reader's attention away from what's going on to "what the heck is she talking about"? Do authors in your sub-genre truly do that? Tone down the frou-frou and concentrate on the ATMOSPHERE.

• Writing, especially romance writing in all its sub-genres, involves a generous dose of EMOTION. Does every page (okay, every other one) of your manuscript have someone reacting emotionally to something? We're linking the reader in to your story, and one of the best ways to do that--especially in a romance--is by giving them some kind of emotion to latch onto.

One of the most eye-opening workshops I've ever taken was Margie Lawson's "Empowering Characters Emotions." It is given online and I believe she also has info packs that give the same info but without the feedback opportunities that one of her classes has. Say, she's about to give another class over at http://pasic.net/class_lawson_032010.html . You will come away with a HUGE stack of course lectures (I still haven't gotten all the way through mine). In it she teaches her EDITS system, which is worth the price of admission alone. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!

The packets are available at her website: http://www.margielawson.com/index.php/lecture-packets . I don't want to sound like I'm her pitch-woman, but these things are great. Deep, hard-to-read sometimes, takes a lot of effort to wade through, but you can do like I did and pick and choose what you want to concentrate on, vowing that you'll be back to read the rest... later. (That reminds me: I'm not through her "procrastination" course yet.)

Let's get some real, stomach-churning, laugh-out-loud-ing, happy-ever-after emotion into your writing!

So my wish, future Golden Heart entrants, is that next year your entry will be lightyears better because your skill at your craft has been honed through whatever means you choose to advance yourself. Let's hope your entry really will be publisher ready, that you will be recognized by the GH, or at least (most?) a publisher or agent who will see in you the next New York Times bestseller!

Friday, November 20, 2009

Time for Art of the Carolinas!



So it was the second weekend (and the two days before) in November, and time for ART OF THE CAROLINAS!

Jerry’s Artarama likes to bill this as the biggest event of its kind in the world. What it is, is 4 days of workshops, lots given by famous artists and/or artists who really know their stuff (and some not so much), and 3 days of a trade floor that is pure Christmas for artists. We get to see all the latest products--and they’re coming out with SO MUCH these days--and we get to see people on the floor demonstrating them, or barring that, get to talk with experts about technical stuff.

Last year after being completely ignored several times by Winsor & Newton’s website as to a technical question, I was able to ask a guy at the W&N booth about how to make sure that when I reworked an old oil painting the new paint wouldn’t cause any problems. (You know, flake off or something.) A relatively high-ranking member of the company, he had a definite opinion about that but also leaned around the corner to his right and caught the attention of two other folks who knew even more about the chemical makeup of oil paints. I was able to walk away with a confident game plan! That plus he took my story of not getting feedback off the website extremely seriously and said that he would take it up with the people who needed to improve things when he got back.

This year, Thursday began with me getting a late start from the house for my 9:00 class. I don't speed. I kept recalling how a psychic lecturer had once told us how she liked to “time” herself--slip around regular time--when she drove. She said she had driven to our class (this was back when I was in psychic school) from the deeps of Quebec to Durham, NC in 8 hours. A couple of times in my life it had seemed that I’d been able to “time” drives, so I tried to do it now.

And I pulled up at the hotel with 15 minutes to spare. You tell me.

Amazingly, AotC wasn’t quite ready for business yet. Usually they’ve got schedules up on the wall: which classes are meeting where, etc. This time: zippo was ready. This year the hotel opened up two small ballrooms (which are usually part of the trade floor) for classrooms, and we arrived to find a few tables in place and plastic on the floor, but nothing else. Staff, teachers and attendees had to work quickly to get things organized and separation walls put up between us and the next classroom.

Anyway, the all-day class (until 4) was “Abstract Impressionism” with local artist Joe DiGiulio. FABulous!!! It took me deeper into the techniques than I’d gotten so far and gave me a lot of confidence to experiment. We students luxuriated in having entire tables to ourselves (usually Jerry’s crams us 3 to a table, and the tables are only about 24 inches deep). Guess it pays to have an instructor who’s married to the lady who puts the show together?

Anyway, great fun and I got 3 solid paintings out of it. The last one was the largest and on canvas. While I painted the first layer background I kept getting a certain impression of what it reminded me of. “Uh oh,” I said, but went for broke anyway.

Halfway through the spangles Joe came around to look. “Channeling Jasper Johns?” he asked.

“Wonder Woman,” I replied.

Needless to say, this is the painting at the top of the blog. It's 20" square, painted on wrap-around canvas. Here are the two others I did during the morning session, both about 12x9 or 9x12, depending on which way you look at ‘em:



The drive home was horrendous. We’d been under Tropical Depression Ida for a few days, and she wasn’t letting up. It was driving rain, wind, darkness, exhaustion, and rush hour all the way across three counties. Ugh! Let me repeat: ugh, ugh, ugh!

Friday I attended my job, which was knee-deep in (sale!) catalog as well as our regular packages. I’d come in the previous Sunday to work, and with that managed to finish everything that had a deadline that day. Whew!

Saturday I ran a bit early leaving from home, despite having to pack for an overnight stay. (It’s my once-a-year luxury.) I stopped for gas and debated the time. I was going to drop by Lowe’s to return a bit that my gas man hadn’t needed in installing the new gas logs, but decided that I shouldn’t push my luck. I arrived at the hotel a very comfortable 25 minutes ahead of class time and snagged a staff person to tell me where my class was.

This time was also an all-day class, but now was something like “bold acrylics as watercolor using interactive acrylics.” I was interested in both acrylics used as watercolors (I’m terrible at watercolors and desperately need more practice!) and in interactives, of which I’d purchased a sample pack last year and never opened.

On Thursday I’d run into an expert in acrylics who told me that (1) he hated interactives, (2) he hated the interactives manufacturer, and (3) he hated the interactives salespeople. Uh oh! I tried taking it with a few grains of salt.

There were only two of us students in this weekend class. Weekend classes sell out first. Always. That little alarm at the back of my head began to buzz even louder.

Our instructor had laid out several sample paintings. They looked like third graders had done them, blops of color placed across the page in a line. At one point during the class our instructor told us that in his whole life he’d sold maybe two paintings. I asked myself, “Why am I shelling out big bucks for this guy to teach me?”

I’m sorry, but even if it were true and I was teaching a class, if they asked me how my art business was going, I’d tell ‘em that I’d recently had a one-woman show at Windsor Palace. I mean, let ‘em fact-check me afterward. I have a professional impression to make as I teach!

Needless to say, my acrylic watercolors looked like crap, though I got praise for technique and color. The final painting was pretty much copying off of what the instructor had done as he tried out a completely new kind of board to him (and made us do the same!) (ca-ching down the drain! I mean, having your class try out materials you’re unfamiliar with when you’re trying to teach them? Ooh, such a rotten idea!). That painting I might be able to salvage and sell, I dunno. I haven’t finished it yet:


The instructor seemed to be a really nice guy. He told amusing stories and was the kind of person you like spending time with just talking. He was very enthusiastic as well. An excellent sketcher. But he needs to come up with another way to present his class. The only thing I really learned was (1) never ever to use that kind of board again, and (2) that interactives, used in a watercolor manner, stay wet a little longer than regular acrylics and that’s IT. You can’t really “open” them (the whole point of interactives, right?) on watercolor paper the way you can on canvas when you’re painting in an oil paint manner.

Whatever. I raced out of class to pick up my goodie bag (which I hadn’t gotten on Thursday), an event tee shirt, and to do a quick recon of the trade floor before it closed for the night on Saturday. Sundays are always the best day to shop. You get bargains, though you also run the risk of things selling out.

Tried Bahama Breeze next to the Hilton for dinner. Got in right away and had a nice meal if a tad pricey. Was able to demonstrate my Kindle to a curious waitress who had one on her Christmas list. Went back to my hotel room, which meant I also avoided the last of the night rain on I-40, hurrah!

AotC is the one consistent time of the year when I spend a night in a real hotel and order room service for breakfast. I get a clean room, clean bathroom, a mattress that doesn’t come in the shape of a “U,” lots of pillows, and a TV I can watch from either a comfy chair or the bed. The North Raleigh Hilton was certainly classier than the Homestead Inn I’d been staying at up to last year during AotC, and it was handy being just above the show.

I hadn’t noticed anything wrong with the room when I checked in. When I returned from dinner there was a definite chill in the air. On rare occasions I get these chill episodes, so perhaps it was that, but I never heard the heat turn on that evening but the constant fan from the heating unit meant that something was still functioning and maybe the heat itself was completely silent. I turned the heat up. Nothing. Since there was nothing on TV (why didn’t they carry Comedy Central, which I’d counted on for Saturday entertainment?) I curled up in a cold bed and read a very good Dave Barry book on my Kindle. Thank goodness there was a spare blanket in the closet. At one point I considered using the extra towels as blankets as well.

COLD! I kept hitting the thermostat and zippo happened. Finally about 2 AM there was a click at the thermostat, an answering click from the heater, and suddenly the room went equatorial. I had to throw off all covers, as well as the sheet.

By 5:30 AM the heat was finally acting normal. Whew!

One of the perks of an annual hotel trek is ordering room service for a nice fattening breakfast. The hell with price; bring my breakfast to my door! And make sure there's a cute metal dome over the main plate. Mine arrived right on time. They got part of the order wrong, but not the main part. They did eventually bring me tea (I’d used up all the tea that came with the room the previous evening) but forgot any sweetener. Good thing I’d packed some. But the eggs were flat and tasteless. It should be a crime to cook bacon so it tastes awful. The cranberry juice was definitely watered down. I was surprised it was still red. Good tea. I hate to think how much I paid for a little over a cup of hot water, which was all they furnished with the tray. (Heated up some more in my room’s coffee maker.)

Took a nap to make up for the night before and just because I could. Ah, decadence!

Well, that claim to luxury eventually ran its course. Checked out, packed the car tightly so as to make sure I had as much room as possible for what I was going to buy, and waited a few minutes for the trade floor to open. Went through and grabbed the stuff I’d zeroed in on the night before.

Figured out that the way to tell if that Steven Quiller DVD was the same one that I had on VHS, was not to ask the staff at his table--they had no idea--or try to track down the artist himself (though I did pass him in the hall when leaving), but rather to look at the copyright date. Bingo: 2003. I passed on that one and bought the other. After all, Steven Quiller is a god. When I grow up, I want to paint a lot like him. Not exactly, but with the same kind of color ‘tude, simplicity and ease.

Went over to the Matisse brand table and found Joe DG there working (it was in Jerry’s section). Bought some Matisse colored gessos that he’d recommended and he pointed out the cheap but nice Titanium White from Lukas that he likes to use especially for large projects.

In his workshop we’d done his “Black Bag” exercise, in which he gives students a small bag with a few implements and brushes, and then dishes out two colors and a bit of white and tells them to paint. We got a goldish-orange color that was named after an Australian tree (or maybe that was another color), and a bluish green that was called “Southern Ocean.” You see, Matisse is located in Australia so everything is named after Australian stuff. Joe pointed out that “Southern Ocean” had the same color formulation as Thalo Blue (Turquoise), so it’s all marketing, right? The Australian tree sure looked and acted a lot like Quin Gold to me, though I didn’t get a chance to compare formulation codes (which are listed on labels by law).

Hint: Joe told us he liked to use opposite colors on the color wheel but tweaked the idea to use the ones that are just off being primaries. This adds subtlety to paintings. So instead of blue and orange, he kicked the color to a greenish blue and a reddish orange (that turned goldy when diluted). Worked terrifically!

Then I aimed myself at (1) mats. Joe had told us to think of the entire process of framing from a cohesive economics standpoint. Buy the pre-cut available mats to determine (2) what size paper you’ll work on, and then buy (3) frames to fits the mats. So I got a few packs of cheap ones and larger ones as well, hoping they’d fit what I’ve already done at home. Got a block of W/C paper (from Steven Quiller, who was having a very nice sale) and some cheap but okay frames.

Over at the Burning Tree Studios desk they were doing BOGO DVDs. It was difficult to find a second one. I’ve already got a handful at home of good ones, plus a handful of just awful ones, I mean, ptui! Told them that they needed to make sure there were “next” buttons in the gallery sections of their DVDs (the girl was astounded that there weren’t, but there aren’t, not always) (she dutifully took notes to pass along to TPTB) (I love AotC! It’s the direct line to God), and found a second DVD that looked interesting.

Grabbed a few other things and began to think about lunch. The hotel dining room was finishing up brunch and didn’t serve lunch. The hotel’s sports restaurant wouldn’t open until 12 (it was almost that), at which time the entire convention crush would descend along with overdressed Sunday outsiders. Went out to walk and stretch the legs that hadn’t seen much exercise in a few days. Walked past Bahama Breeze, but didn’t want to do that two days in a row. The next place was Denny’s.

Ordered a breakfast from Denny's despite having had a similar one at the hotel early that morning. Did I say “similar”? This one was lovely! Delicious! Cheap! Ahh. I’m so glad there’s no Denny's near my house. I’d go broke and gain about 100 pounds in no time.

Got back to the hotel in time to read Dave Barry a few more minutes and then staked my claim for my place in the afternoon class in Art Marketing, given by wild n crazy Bob Burridge and his wife.


(Sorry, Bob. Next time I'll bring my non-blurry camera and wait for a good pose.)

MAAAN! OMG! They stuffed us full of marketing know-how and hints of how to step out into the Real World of Art as a true Professional. I bought the updated version of their marketing book that I’d bought years ago. When they come through Raleigh again (they usually hit us a couple times a year) I hope Bob will be giving his two-day version of the workshop because it seems there’s an AWFUL lot more I need to know!

So the Burridge and DiGiulio classes were abfab, completely worth the price and more. I should be able to sell significantly more than I have after taking these classes. And (hee hee) Bob told us that we should never, EVER sell off eBay. When I arrived home (kitties were fine!) my computer informed me that I’d just sold a painting there. Think I’ll try selling the early, not-quite-up-to-snuff stuff there until the end of the year, at which point I’ll become a Professional Arteest and turn up my nose at the site in relation to fine art.

How long is it until next November? I loves me that Art of the Carolinas!